wait

Has my heart stopped beating? I am alive but do I feel alive? At times life jumbles in to a mess of late nights, empty conversations, starbucks and waiting. You walk through life, hoping to catch the eye of a few skirts. All those Disney movies made it clear find your soul mate and live happily ever after. Easy enough right? So you wait for it to happen. Then you get to the point where you are so concerned with waiting that life seems to take a giant leap forward. Your friends are married, your old girlfriend just had her first child and here you are… still the same shy boy from the ninth grade. Still waiting. You look at everyone else, with their goals and plans of making it big in the next couple of years. You dream of a prize wife, a new beamer and a two acre lawn. Perhaps all of these things will let everyone else know how happy you want to be. Maybe after all the work you’ve done for yourself you will finally be happy. Still waiting. Your hope for a better future has a numbing effect on the scars left from your past.